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Manners in any other language
Posted 9:48 PM on Mon-6-Aug-2012
It's not until other children play up that Pocket & The Legend's wonderfulness is really brought to light.

I know our kids are good kids. People often comment on their manners and how well behaved they are when they're out and about (if only same people saw them at home lol). Manners are very high on The Bloke & my list of priorities, as is honesty and respect, and for the most part, Pocket and The Legend are fantastic at living up to our expectations in these areas.

We are currently in week two of what is becoming a very drawn out visit from a home-stay student from Japan. Unlike Pocket and The Legend, this boy lacks in manners and respect and for want of a better phrase, is doing my head in.

I am so glad Japan headed off to bed at the same time as The Legend tonight. I am so happy to just sit here with The Bloke and not have to deal with him. As terrible as that may sound, I never expected I'd have to harp on and on at a teenager as much as one would expect to harp on at a pre-schooler.

The weekend was raining and we were stuck inside for most of it and like a broken record I repeated the same requests...

"Japan, please do not sit on the back of the couch"
"Japan, please let the cat sleep"
"Japan, please don't tutu with the tv when someone's watching it"
"Japan, please wash your hands"
"Japan, please don't touch the other kids' food"
"Japan, the cat doesn't need more food"
"Japan, please stay at the table until we've all finished eating"
"Japan, do you have any clothes to be washed"
"Japan, please open your curtains & make your bed"
"Japan, don't run in the house"

and that's just an example. All things that the average four year old is able to comprehend. Now while I know there is a language barrier, there are things which go without saying and things which are just common sense, in any language... or perhaps in any language but Japanese ?

Hate to say it, but roll on Saturday.

Go JO!

Posted by GoMummyJo


Comments (7)
SarahK - 6:44 PM on Tue-7-Aug-2012  
How awful!
I have never had students, but have a friend who hosts them all the time. Its been hit and miss for them too. Having met many of them, their manners, along with hygiene practices leave one shaking their head. Shocking!
NZferret - 2:39 PM on Tue-7-Aug-2012  
Maaaaaaaate, I could write a book on this topic. I hate to say it, but this continues into their 20's and 30's too. I have hosted international students for over 4 years and request no one under 18 (I don't want to be the curfew/booze police). Most are around the 24yo mark but, perhaps because back home Mum still does everything for them, they have the level of maturity and thoughtfulness I had when I was about 12. My main 2 rules were to shut doors quietly (baby sleeping) and to let me know if they were or were not going to be home for dinner. Hardly rocket science, but you'd be amazed at how many of them struggled to remember this on a daily basis. Other than that, the other guidelines came down to generally being considerate of others in the house. Mixed results. The last 2 students I had were SO toxic and didn't give a damn about rule 1 and 2, despite my asking the school for help on several occasions and getting rules translated into their native languages, that I sold all the furniture for that room the moment the last student left and swore I'd never get another. 2 months later I am preparing for one more student... oh please God, please let this one be a considerate human being capable of pleasant conversation!
kipper - 2:34 PM on Tue-7-Aug-2012  
It is sad that some parents just don't think manners are important! Unfortunately it's just as bad in this country.
Our kids (4, nearly 3 and 6 months) all ask to leave the table, and take their own plates to the bench. They say please and thank you otherwise they don't get anything and are expected to eat nicely and to use their manners when going out in public or if at other peoples houses. I know, as a Mum, how important it will be later on when they are older and trying to impress a young man or woman's parents :-) Sadly, I don't know many other children with the same or better manners

What an ordeal for you Jo - you will no doubt be thankful of your own kids manners when you are on your own again at the end of the week.
thecoffeelady - 2:02 PM on Tue-7-Aug-2012  
I really admire your patience, I couldn't possibly have home stay students in my house, I find it trying even having my nephews and neices after the first day. I'm a peace and quiet kind of person and really need my privacy.
GoMummyJo - 8:49 AM on Tue-7-Aug-2012  
In the past, the ones we've had have been fine. This boy reminds me of two little French boys my family hosted when I was about 14-15. They drove Ma insane with their bad manners & lack of respect. I can see why she chose never to host again. If this was our first time, I'd be inclined to say no more too. In fact, I think we might have a rest for a bit. The money is ok, you don't make a lot but it's not worth the stress this time.
MumBum - 8:28 AM on Tue-7-Aug-2012  
Sounds like some one needs a good smacked bottom.lol
Seriously though, an old work mate of mine was a home stay parent and in her case China did nothing to help out, would not engage with the family and had to be reminded to do the simplest things like "China, can you please take your plate to the sink when you finish eating!"...even my two year old knows to place his plate on the bench when he is done eating!

I had thought being a home stay parent might be a good experience for our family, but if this is what I would have to put up with, lets just say, it would be unpleasant for everyone... I wouldn't have the patience to repeat myself over and over!
JulieKidspotter - 12:25 AM on Tue-7-Aug-2012  
1, 2, 4 and 9 I repeat constantly to my kids ... number 10 is not a rule in our house I'm afraid ;)
And hubby was obviously never taught number 7, which really bugs me.

But I've got to ask ... "tutu with the tv"?? Can't say that I've ever heard that phrase? I assume you mean he's switching channels. I don't get to tell anyone off for that in my house because I AM the queen of the remote :)


   
 
 
 
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